I Love Myself: Identity

Ahhh … identity. It’s comprised of so many factors and makes us label ourselves. Which some people like and others don’t.

I personally think labels have helped me find a sense of self.

I’m a cis Latinx woman who identifies as pansexual.

(No, I am not sexually attracted to pans) Like some of my family members like to tease me about.

I struggled with my identity up until my junior year of high school.

When I was around 5 years old I began to realize that I had crushes on girls. When I was in the fourth grade I knew that I liked one of my best friends.

Over our summer break she bought us both journals that we wrote in and exchanged them at the start of the new school year. It was our way of being able to know what went on all summer long without having been there together.

Side note: Wasn’t that such a cute idea?

This made me question my religion. Growing up as a Catholic I was taught that being gay was wrong and I would suffer the consequences in hell. *DUN DUN DUN*

But I’ve learned that God loves everyone for who they are and as long as you’re a good person and own up to your mistakes, everything will work itself out when the time comes.

I also struggled with my gender identity. I would say that most people would describe me as dominant, which we’re taught is a trait that men should have.

I also started to think that if I like girls, does that mean I should be a man? I learned a few years later that’s not how sexuality and gender identity work.

It’s all about the way that you feel internally.

When I was in high school I made a Tumblr account, like most high schoolers do and I came across a post about the LGBTQ+ community.

The post had definitions of sexualities like demisexuality, bisexuality and pansexuality.

When I read the definition of pansexuality I instantly knew that’s what I was. Everything began to click.

Sexuality is different to everyone

To me pansexuality is being attracted to people for who they are, regardless of their gender identity.

So almost 4 years later, during my junior year of college I went to my first Pride festival!

I had the best time and I felt so free and welcome. I highly recommend going if you want to learn more about the LGBTQ+ community.

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